The 7 F's to a Fantastic Family

After almost 5 years of marriage, I'm pretty convinced that having a thriving family life is not something that "just happens."  Among other things, it takes effort,  intentionality, and a commitment to remain connected to your spouse.  One thing Garry and I have implemented to maintain our connection is a weekly family meeting.  During this time, we talk about our essential "7 F's"- areas we believe are crucial to experiencing a joyful and purpose-filled life together. 

With each section, I've included the biblical basis for its importance as well as some sample questions to take inventory of how you and your family are doing in that area. Take a peruse and implement what you feel makes sense for you.  Cheers!

Faith
In Matthew 7, Jesus is pretty clear that if we want a life that will withstand hardship, the foundation of that life needs to be rooted in Jesus Christ and the truth of God's word.  And this isn't just a theoretical foundation. We actually need to live our life according to God's wisdom and prioritize our relationship with Him above everything else.

1. Personal - How have each of you been doing with you personal time with God? Reading the Bible? Praying? Do you feel connected to God?  How can you support each other in getting more connected if something in this area is lacking? 
2.  Collective -  How have you guys been doing in your collective time with God?  As husband and wife, are you reading the Bible together, praying together, or singing songs to God in worship together? How often do you want to be engaging in these things each week? Are you including your children in any of your family time with God?
3. Ministry -  If you guys are engaged in ministry activities either collectively or individually, this is the place to discuss how things are going.  Any updates to give each other?  Any things that need to happen this week to keep things running smoothly? 

Family
From a biblical perspective, the institution of marriage is sacred.  More than anything else, it should reflect Christ's unparalleled and sacrificial love toward his bride, the church (Eph 5: 21 - 33).  I also believe that children extrapolate a lot about the character of God, their heavenly Father, from the examples they find in their earthly parents. The devil would have a field-day destroying marriages and families if he had it his way, and if we let him. One way to prevent that from happening is to make sure we are communicating honestly about our marriages and our families with our spouse.   

1. Marriage - How are you two feeling about your marriage?  Is there any tension between you two that needs to be talked about?  What about your sex life?  Are you feeling satisfied with where it is? 
2. Kids -  Any issues you need to discuss regarding your kids?  How are you doing leading them closer to the heart of God? Any upcoming logistics that need to be managed? 
3. Extended Family -  Any updates to give each other regarding extended family (your parents, siblings, cousins, etc?)  We typically use this to discuss any prayer requests for our family that we want to lift up to God over the next week. 

Friends
If there is one thing that will prevent us and our families from receiving everything God has for our lives, it is trying to do life in isolation.  We are made for relationships, and God uses these relationships to encourage us (1 Thes 5:11), to sharpen our character (Proverbs 27:17) and to help people learn about Jesus (Matthew 28:19-20).  Being in community is essential to a healthy life so make sure to invest in your relationships!

1. General - How are your friendships going? Are you feeling fulfilled in these relationships? Are you being a good friend to others right now? 
2. Christian Community -  How are you doing with connecting to Christian brothers and sisters? Are you participating in a small group or bible study? Any issues there?
3. Non Christian Community - Are you investing in relationships with non believers? How are those relationships going?

Finances
Did you know that the Bible talks about money more than any other subject?! It goes without saying, then, that our relationship to money is a big deal to God.  We are called to be good stewards over all that God has given us (Luke 16:10) and to protect our hearts from being greedy or trusting in our finances above God himself (Heb 13:5, Math 6:24) 

1. Budgets - Have you set up a monthly budget? How has the week gone im sticking to your budget?  Are there any new budget items or upcoming spending that needs to be discussed?
2. Giving -  How is your heart toward giving? Does your budget and spending patterns reflect God's heart for the poor?  Have you been faithful with tithing? 
3. Saving - Are you being overindulgent and spending everything you have? Or are you setting something aside in case of emergencies? 

Function

Whether we are in school or working, God has positioned us for a specific purpose.  And no matter what the "functional" purpose we are assigned in the moment, we are called to work hard because we are really working for God and not man (Col 3:23 - 24).  

1. Work/School- How are you feeling regarding work or school? Any issues to discuss?
2. Advancement - Are there any plans for job changes or professional advancement that need to be talked about? 

Fitness
As followers of Christ, our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit and we are called to honor God with our bodies (1 Corin 6: 19 -20).   For this reason, we use the Fitness section to discuss all things related to our health.

1. Eating and Exercise - Have you been active over the last week? Have you been eating healthily? What can be done to live a more healthy lifestyle over the next week?
2. Appointments -  Are you all caught up on important health appointments like annual physicals, eye exams and dentist appointments? 

Fun
All work and no play makes for a miserable life. The book of Ecclesiastes tells us that the ability to enjoy life is from the hand of God (Ecc 2: 24 - 25) and Christ, himself, said that he has come to give us an abundant life (John 10:10).  Making sure to take time for ourselves and have fun throughout our week is a must. 

1. Weekly - How are you doing in the "fun" department?  What ideas do you have to get out and enjoy life over the next week?  Are you implementing a Sabbath, a day every week where you step away from your normal tasks to just spend time with God and with your loved ones? 
2. Monthly/Yearly - Do you have any plans for a vacation within the year? Are there any logistics to work out to make sure that gets implemented? 

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